Don't Take It Personal

Well, it's about that time again. Before the holidays carry me away from writing altogether, I figured now would be as good of a time as any to update my very small cache of posts. I'm really kicking myself right now for not doing this last week when I felt really inspired to write about all the small but new revelations I was uncovering about teaching, which also happened to be pretty telling of life as well. Now its all gone, I have no idea where those brief moments of wisdom went. They came and left just about as quick as my lunch break. I did manage to hold onto one major piece of inspiration that came to me over the past month and that is something I'm sure we all hear at some point or another of our lives. However cliche and overused, it does ring very true at times that really beg this of us. So here it is. My real insightful motto for the past month..."Don't take this personal."

Pretty deep huh? Yep, that's what I spent my valuable lunch time coming up with. Anyway, like I said, although cliche, it does ring true at times in which we really need to remind ourselves to do such a thing. Times when you've spent twenty good, long minutes explaining "acceleration" to your fifth graders and they all still look at you as if you're asking them to locate the Lost Ark. Times when you've reviewed for their test, used practically the same questions, the same format, and gone to extremes to make sure the questions are written just right for those little ten year old minds, and you still have two earn F's. Times when you have a kid, whom you know is more than capable, continue to meet the bare minimum just because he can, despite what you say or do not say to him about how he's "cheating himself." I used to take all of this personally. And I'd be lying if I said I didn't still take some of it personally.

There are days where I still feel that my students' achievements and lack of achievement is due to my ability as their teacher, which is true, but I realize now, it is to an extent. Their actions in my class may not always reflect their potential and their grades may not always reflect their intelligence. But, at the end of each day, when I close my classroom door, if I can be sure they've gone home having learned at least one new thing about math, science, or just life in general, then I can take those more trying times with a grain of salt and know that it's not always something I can do better. It isn't always something that I missed or didn't do well enough, sometimes there isn't even a good answer for why it didn't work, it just didn't. And instead of staring at your grade book (or your life, if we're speaking in metaphors here) and trying to make sense of it all, stop staring, close the book, and just tell yourself "Don't take this personally. Move forward. Keep trying."

Very new attitude for me. Being a perfectionist, I've spent most of my life feeling like I could have perfected a situation better, given more time or more information or whatever. But I'm realizing that all this time I've spent analyzing the past from every possible angle, I've cheated myself of the present. I'm learning that a good part of being a well-rounded person is to do what you can and move on. Let the other stuff take care of itself. Plus, it just feels good. I'm liking the freedom it gives me. I don't second guess myself every five seconds anymore. And the energy I used thinking about the past, now goes to my present, where it belongs.


In honor of some of my beloved 90's music and inspired by this post:

 

Oh and Happy Thanksgiving :)